The Subway Seating Situation

One thing I skeeve more than anything is someone else's body rubbing up against mine - except my girlfriend's of course :) People, if there is a sliver of an inch between me and that obtrusive vertical bar on the subway, do not sit next to me! Why should I have to squeeze my legs together, crunching my balls, just so you can ease your fat ass onto a seat? And no, I can't leave my legs open at a comfortable man distance, because I absolutely refuse to have any part of my body rub against yours. Okay, I have failed to shower today, but at least I showered last night! I know dogs that shower more often than you.

It's bad enough I have to worry about the seat I'm sitting on, or the bar I'm touching. God knows what kinds of bodily fluids or bacteria villages live on those uncomfortable 70s orange grooved seats.

The Commissioner Talks Baseball

Hear what the nomadic Lower East Sidean has to say about America's favorite past time, and of course its relationship with money.

They're, Their, There and Your, You're

I may not have the best grammar or punctuation skills, but can we all gather around as a society and quickly lay this out for the sake of my own well being? Listen, I didn't pay attention in fifth grade English either. I couldn't wait to go home, eat a snack, crack open a soda, and watch a ten hour block of television (yes, that's what I did.) But, for the love of Oprah, can we please start using the proper forms of their, there, they're and your, you're?

Okay, just pay attention for like one minute and then you can go back to A.D.D'ing over facebook, twitter, espn, imdb, or whatever other popular site you frequent.

Here we go:

See this thing --> ' <--- that's what we call an APOSTROPHE. You're allowed to use it. Now -- “They’re” is a contraction of “they are.”

So, if you’ve written “they’re,” ask yourself whether you can substitute “they are.” If not, you’ve made a mistake.

“Their” is a possessive pronoun like “her” or “our” “They eat their pizza with pepperoni.”

Everything else is “there.”

“There goes the baseball, out of the park! See it? Right there! There aren’t very many home runs like that.”


NEXT

Remember that APOSTROPHE? You may use it again! So -- You're is a contraction of "you are." "You are going to lose the game," can become, "You're going to lose the game."

"Your" is the possessive form of you. This is your game. (Meaning you own the game.)


I'll digress because I don't want to turn this into a lame how-to blog. However, please feel free to refer to this post when writing your next facebook status complaining about your life, or telling us where in the world you currently are. If you're going to rub it in our face that you're on a beach in January -- at least use the proper forms of your/you're and there/their/they're.

Stay tuned next week for "its/it's."